How to deal with comparison and develop your ability to manifest your dream life is what this article is about
Comparing ourselves is a natural process… we are social creatures.
It helps us to see where we are in life, and where we want to be. It allows us to calibrate to what we see…
This process can be conscious. But it’s mostly unconscious.
We constantly have this little program running in the back of our heads to compare where we are in life
The problem is that today with the explosion of social media, we don’t compare ourselves to our peers and close circle that might be 1 or 2 steps ahead but to the whole world and people that are maybe 100 or 1000 steps ahead…
which can create so many problems such as…
- Having negative thoughts about yourself and your journey. Thinking to yourself “why am I not there yet?”
- Because we live in a society where lack and scarcity are omnipresent, it can reinforce this idea that there’s not enough to go around, that if someone has what I want it means I’ll never have it. And instead of comparison behind a motivator to calibrate to something better for ourselves, it creates the opposite and ends up… well.. Feeling like shit.
- It supports the distortion that we are not enough and never will be enough because someone will always be a step ahead. And if we already suffer from worthiness issues that will reinforce it.
- Comparison brings a lots of heavy emotions and feelings of jealousy, frustration, hopelessness, lethargy may arise
- These feelings can become a huge obstacle to the inspiration and motivation we need to go forward, follow and make our dreams happen.
- Even if you don’t have a big vision and dreams for yourself (which I doubt if you’re reading this) comparison will most likely impact your relationships (to yourself and to others)
The biggest trap is that most of the time comparison is not even accurate. It’s an illusion. We compare our 100% messy not-so-perfect lives to a snippet of someone else’s life, the 10% of their experienced reality
A lot of people, especially on social media, are paid (or have other sorts of interests/ benefits) from having this picture-perfect-glamorized-fabricated-fancy-life
Antidotes to comparison: How to stop comparing
- Limit your time on social media. Nourish yourself from your own presence.
- Be your own source of motivation and inspiration. Look in the past, how far you’ve come.. Honor your own journey and the your own unique rhyme
- Use gratitude…
- Remember that you don’t have CONTEXT for most of what you see.
How to use comparison to your advantage:
In order to manifest your dream life it’s not only important that you stop comparing yourself to others but that you actually use it as inspiration…
- Don’t fight it. What you resist persists, so instead of trying to make it disappear, make room for it and learn from it.
- See comparison as a way to realize what’s possible for you too ! People that have what you want, become reference points of what’s also available for you.
You don’t even have to know HOW they did it, but simply to know that if someone else did it before, you can do it too. Like this people become EXAMPLE of the life you want to cultivate.
- Celebrate others….Instead of creating feelings of resentment, or envy, cultivating a higher vibration will attract those things more easily. If you are happy for someone it will magnetize that same thing to you. Also because your subconscious mind won’t let you go for something that you judge or criticize.
Dive deeper into this work by joining my online program BECOMING HER: embrace your fullness and design your desired life